Sunday, March 25, 2012

Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

 I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
 Asked loudly, 'How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?'
 I turned around and walked back out and never went back.
 My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.

 I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I
 Was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for
 Several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen
 Who worked at the store. He asked if he could help me.
 Without thinking, I looked at him and said, 'I think I like playing
 With men's balls'

 My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
 Variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the
 Boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
 I replied, ' No, I'm just looking at your nuts.'
 My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned
 Beet-red and walked away.
 To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

 This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
 Embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think
 Before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get
 Any! We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed
 To have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and
 'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?'
 Not only did Bob have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they
 Were laughing so hard!

 Now, didn't that feel good?

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