Sunday, November 8, 2009

How To Get Out of Hell Free

What is a Get out of Hell Free Card? Aren't we all looking for this? Haven't we all have done something we feel sure will land us a hot seat in hell, something where we violated a trust or confidence that contaminated our soul? We walk the world somberly awaiting our fate. What can be done about it? Do we get a second chance? The answer is "Hell yes, we do".

In Monopoly, there is a Get out of Jail Free Card. It may be used at the player's discretion when he/she gets in a bind. No punishment, just instant freedom, like salvation served from a microwave. A Get Out of Hell Free is a card given for doing an outstanding, righteous, good deed. Saving a life worthy of saving, committing to the sick, making a difference to someone that will be eternal are all worthy of the Card. Keeping a promise made to someone in the afterlife is deserving of a Get Out of Hell Free Card. It will get you out of Hell free. It is a one time deal!

The card may be used at the point of entry to Hell. When presented to the gate keeper, do not pass go. You are directly whisked to Heaven to have your credentials reviewed. If it is determined your card is valid and given for a selfless act, you will be given a seat in Heaven. Collect as many as possible in case the first one turns out to be invalid.

To find out more about the amazing cards and to be considered, please send your comment to this location and a description of your deed to determine if you should get out of Hell free. Liars who feign righteousness will certainly go to Hell. In other words, Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin do not qualify. If someone applies and receives this valuable card for nefarious reasons, a seat over the roasting pit is your eternal reward. If you end up there, say "Hah!" to Dick Cheney.

Once these cards are distributed please keep in a safe location. They are not transferable. There is no interest and it is good for eternity. You may use yours to argue a case for someone less noble which could cause you to receive another card. Here, no good deed goes unrewarded.

1 comment:

ThisIsTrue said...

"They are not transferable."

Well, not quite. Like the Monopoly Get Out of Jail Free card, the Get Out of Hell Free card says right on it, "May be kept until needed or sold." And you can see that in the photo at