Friday, August 21, 2009
Eve's Concrete Experience
Eve closed her eyes and tried to erase her mind. There were too many big questions, too much she couldn’t answer. She wanted to relax her mind and escape into a dream that need not make sense. But were dreams earthbound because they were produced by an earthbound body or were dreams touching on the reality of existence beyond the earthbound body? Somehow this concentration lulled Eve into a space where dreams could happen.
Blues and greens swirled around Eve’s thoughts. She realized she was floating in water and she was feeling cool, soothing wetness surround her. This realization grounded her again. By thinking, she bounced back to a perplexing place. Her mind was real estate to frustration.
Once again she let go and began to flow in the river where there were no thoughts, only lightness and moving in liquid existence. As before, she began to think and compare the complexities of thought and the prismatic aspect of everything. That was it, rather than opposing forces, all thoughts were different facets of the same prism. The further away the facet the closer to the illusion of opposition appeared.
She found herself moving swiftly in her dream body. “I’ve got to write this down!” Not realizing that thought alone would change her scenery and she would have what she needed instantly, she unnecessarily turned too sharply around an alter scene and knocked an ethereal resin angel to the floor. She was startled by this action and stopped to pick up the pieces. The angel remained intact except that the wings had been clipped evenly on each side. Her angel was merely a human wearing a golden cape. She picked up the pieces and placed them on the alter. Angel or human, wings or a cape, in some ways it was all the same. It was a lesson in perspective.
Eve relaxed once again and faded into the blues and greens of dissipating thoughts, into the river of timeless space. She observed what she traveled past but allowed only the slightest registration of each symbol or sensation. In this way, she altered the scene as little as possible. She wanted to experience the creation around her rather than changing the flow with her own constant creations.
A growing warmth began pulsating around her face. It spread from her cheek bone to her forehead, ears and chin. It was sensual like an intimate kiss from a far cousin of the sun. The warmth continued to spread down through her neck, out to her arms and continued down through her legs and toes until her entire body was aglow. With this warmth came a feeling of well being and oneness with all. She was a virtual ray of sunshine, nourishing to herself and others.
The scene began to change as if a cloud passed across the sky. It was not a darkening of mood. It brought a subtle excitement the way the promise of rain brings joy to draught ridden farmers, or simply the hot and thirsty or the romantic who seeks candlelight and kindness.
Eve began to experience a cooling and floating sensation inside and with her internal eyes wide open she saw trees, fields, roads houses, churches, schools. The material world as she knew it was below her. She was herself a cloud although she retained her shape.
A feeling of heaviness grew in her body and she wondered how she could stay afloat. In the same instant she let herself go back into the moment knowing that thinking could alter her experience.
She began to feel a pulling sensation on her arms and legs. She looked at them and saw them swollen with a bluish tint. The pulling was not painful yet she could feel the sensation growing more intense. Then with great wonder she saw her fingers and toes start to leak a clear fluid, at first very slowly and then more rapidly like a cloud burst. She was raining on parched land. She was a living cloud.
Eve allowed her self to feel amazement and appreciation without questioning. As she watched her raindrops nourish the scene below she saw flowers, vines, vegetable plants sprouting and saplings growing at a phenomenal rate. Somehow her own life energy was causing the plants and trees to grow.
Her extraordinary vision of nature faded into a swirl of greens and blues with rays of yellow beaming through. Warmth began to return to her face. Slowly Eve began to feel heavy, not in the delightful way in her dream but as if she was a shell being filled with concrete. She began to feel like a human being with finite boundaries and experience. Concrete experience.